Friday, June 11, 2004
Last Day
Well this is my last day here. Spent yesterday packing feverishly and saying goodbye to people I've grown really fond of throughout the last year. Some of whom I know I'm never gonna see again. Like Katie. We had dinner last night. Then went to The Break and played some pool. "Well have a good life." she told me as she hugged me goodbye outside my dorm. She wasn't going to be back next year. Japan in the fall, NYU for the rest of her college life.
In a way, even though I've only known her for like six months, saying goodbye to Katie was harder than saying goodbye to everyone else at the airport when I left in September. I knew I'd see those people at the airport again. Katie, I'm never gonna see ever again. Its one of those things you just know. But even then, I'm a better person for having known her. In the six months that we've been friends she's taught me so much about myself and the person that I want to be. Whether we ever meet again or not, the chapter's been closed. And I leave it with few regrets.
Tomorrow morning, I say goodbye to Reese, who'll be in fucking Florida when I get back here in September. That'll be tough. Reese is like my best friend here. And knowing that she won't be here next year, and we'll never go shopping at the mall, sneak into movies, play frisbee, or hang out again is just a little too much to handle right now. I'm still in a state of admitted denial. But at least I know I'll see her again. We'll visit. With Katie and me, the line ends here.
As I was packing last night, it suddenly hit me. This place. This prison cell of a room has been my home for the last year. I've built memories here. And now I have to move. Never again will I live in a building with communal showers and 20 other girls. Never again will I live with my crazily lovable roommate.
As it dawns upon you that this is your last night at home, you sit here, stare at the walls-- once adorned with posters and photos that were personifications of your identity-- that are now bare as when you first moved in. And you just feel incredibly sad. It means knowing that one of the best years of your life has just passed you by. You'll never be back at this point again. And that cuts right to the inside where it'll hit the hardest.
So this is it. My last day in this dorm and everything that it's come to represent over the last nine months. Last day as a Freshman. Last time I'll ever see some people. Last day. Wow. It's too much to grasp right now.
In a way, even though I've only known her for like six months, saying goodbye to Katie was harder than saying goodbye to everyone else at the airport when I left in September. I knew I'd see those people at the airport again. Katie, I'm never gonna see ever again. Its one of those things you just know. But even then, I'm a better person for having known her. In the six months that we've been friends she's taught me so much about myself and the person that I want to be. Whether we ever meet again or not, the chapter's been closed. And I leave it with few regrets.
Tomorrow morning, I say goodbye to Reese, who'll be in fucking Florida when I get back here in September. That'll be tough. Reese is like my best friend here. And knowing that she won't be here next year, and we'll never go shopping at the mall, sneak into movies, play frisbee, or hang out again is just a little too much to handle right now. I'm still in a state of admitted denial. But at least I know I'll see her again. We'll visit. With Katie and me, the line ends here.
As I was packing last night, it suddenly hit me. This place. This prison cell of a room has been my home for the last year. I've built memories here. And now I have to move. Never again will I live in a building with communal showers and 20 other girls. Never again will I live with my crazily lovable roommate.
As it dawns upon you that this is your last night at home, you sit here, stare at the walls-- once adorned with posters and photos that were personifications of your identity-- that are now bare as when you first moved in. And you just feel incredibly sad. It means knowing that one of the best years of your life has just passed you by. You'll never be back at this point again. And that cuts right to the inside where it'll hit the hardest.
So this is it. My last day in this dorm and everything that it's come to represent over the last nine months. Last day as a Freshman. Last time I'll ever see some people. Last day. Wow. It's too much to grasp right now.
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